And then there were...uuuuhhhhgggg...66.

What is it about The Piano that people love so friggin' much? Is it Harvey Keitel's penis because, personally, that's an image I would love to pay a few hundred bucks to get burned out of my brain. Your just going along, casually waiting for when this movie starts to make any damn sense, and all of the sudden, Bam!, you got an eyeful of Wolf weiner! Holy..what the...was that...Oh my God...your brain stammers as you try to get your senses to return to some semblance of order. Regardless, after I researched metacritic and imdb The Piano was the first to get a pardon. Here's a list of the rest who were saved from any further persecution:

UHF--Maybe it wasn't that bad but it certainly wasn't worth a 65.
Salem's Lot--I threw this one in there knowing it would immediately be saved. Of course, I could have tossed in any number of King movies (do you remember Maximum Overdrive or, I shudder, Graveyard Shift?).
Jumanji--Ehhh, it wasn't all that bad anyway.
Bram Stoker's Dracula--Horrible movie but it was pretty true to the book. I'm guessing purists saved this one.
Hannibal--Come on, people, this movie sucked!
Planet of the Apes--Proof that if you throw enough money at something people will think that it was pretty good regardless of how bad it truly is.
Mars Attacks!--I kinda liked this one so I was glad to see it off the list.
Meet Joe Black--First viewing, worse movie ever. Second viewing, a fine, fine flick. Timing is everything with this one.
A.I.: Artificial Intelligence--This movie was not very good...and apparently it was not very bad either.
The Four Feathers--Never saw it so I'll abstain from having an opinion.
The Adventures of Baron Munchausen--Alright, I don't get it but I don't get a lot of things.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show--I guess kids still need a good reason to dress in drag one time a year.
Pee Wee's Big Adventure--It's a Trifecta! Three cult movies in a row. And all so uniquely different.
Vanilla Sky--What a load pretentious crap! Admit it, this movie made no damn sense! It's like Sixth Sense for intellectuals. I guess Jacob's Ladder was getting a bit too dated.
Natural Born Killers--My brother bought this movie when it first came out and watched it non-stop for ten straight days. Your warned.
April Fools Day--It was a joke? But...how...all those people were quite obviously...oh, forget it. This one gets tossed because of no critic reviews and nobody voting on Imdb. Too obscure and meaningless, I guess.
Simone--Critics hated it but the people saved it (Power to the people!!). I kinda liked it too so, take that you snobs! Now give us our snobby, highly unmarketable movie. Wait. Huh. How the hell did that happen?
The Frighteners--Man, I thought this was a bad movie when I first watched it. I thought the same thing when I watched it again a few years later. No Hobbits, no Nazgul, no One Ring. How is this a good Peter Jackson film?
Waterworld--And a big gun goes down. A potential number one already out. I'm not surprised because I've seen Waterworld and it was no Cinderella Man or Rocky. It had a weak chin despite it's huge budget.
Back To The Future, Part III--Thank you TNT, USA Network, and TBS for brainwashing a nation into thinking this movie is anything better than horrible.
The Godfather, Part III--Alright, it shouldn't have even been here but I couldn't stop myself.
Hook--It was a race to see whose career could fall faster. Winner: Dustin Hoffman. Loser: anybody who watched Hook.